(or, How to Irritate, Alarm, and Creep Out the People You Hope to Work With)
1. Find out as much as you can about us personally. It's always impressive when an author already knows my age and astrological sign.
2. Call us up at work. We love having lengthy chats with strangers about their burgeoning careers. And god knows we've got nothing better to do. This tactic is especially memorable if our extension is not readily available in the company directory.
3. Do regular internet searches to discover what events / conferences we'll be attending. Start showing up at all of them—even if you don't approach us, we'll start wondering about that person who always looks so familiar.
4. Hang out outside our offices and attempt to follow us home. Editors have our defenses down and are more approachable if you can catch us in our apartments.
5. Public restrooms are even better. No one is as vulnerable as they are when they are struggling with their underclothes. This is a perfect chance to pass us your manuscript, or read it to us over the door.
6. Follow us to a bar and sneak a manuscript into our purses when we're distracted. When we find it later, we'll know just how committed you are. Or should be.