Why You Need to Read the Submission Guidelines--

and then follow them.

Thinking of sending in a submission by fax, or on a CD that we're never ever going to look at? Thinking that if you get me on the phone and read your book to me ("it'll only take 5 minutes!")or attach your manuscript to a giant sneaker it'll make you stand out from the masses of other submitters? You're right!

People who think they are above the rules (or living on a different planet from them) spell T-R-O-U-B-L-E. They are going to be one headache after another, throughout the bookmaking process. Editors don't want to work with them.

Maybe you think you are a rebel, or an artiste, and rules are for the dull and narrow-minded. Be careful what assumptions (and adjectives) you apply to the people you're asking to invest time and effort and tens of thousands of dollars in your work.

Maybe you picture yourself a year from now, basking in a circle of admirers and explaining how you shook up a stodgy industry and propelled yourself to stardom.

Listen, you. You can tell your fans whatever you want, once you have some. Until then, act like a fricking professional.